


At the Corner of Astroglide and KY

by Vee017



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 01:59:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3510980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vee017/pseuds/Vee017
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the Tumblr prompt:</p><p>fcutemo: why is lube always right there in fanfics<br/>i want a fic where there’s no lube and the characters are just like fuck we needa go to walgreens put ur dick away</p>
            </blockquote>





	At the Corner of Astroglide and KY

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KingLoptr (Aestridr)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aestridr/gifts).



So Loki was without magic. Thor could work with that. It was a lighter punishment than either one of them could have imagined. His friends had bitched that it was the equivalent of Odin sending Loki to his room, because apparently the Asgardian equivalent to destroying a fucking city was “oh you naughty boy you, no ice cream for dinner”. Honestly Thor couldn’t care less what they thought, he had his brother back.

 

Sullen, irritated, angry, and spending the majority of his time pouting, but Loki was back. And Thor was happy. They hadn’t had sex since before his ruined coronation, but by the Norns he missed Loki’s tight, litter pucker. The way it grabbed him, sucked him in, always so virgin tight… And after almost two years of abstinence, Thor was just itching to get back in there.

 

Thor knocked on Loki’s door and waited with a grin. His grin faltered when he heard something hit the door and Loki’s muffled yell. He was pretty sure Loki asked him what he wanted.

 

“Would you just open the door?”

 

“It’s locked, you idiot; I am essentially a prisoner here, remember? So how about you unlock the damn thing.”

 

“Oh, right.”

 

Thor looked at the keypad to the left of the door, and paused. No one had given him the code. Maybe he could just use Mjolnir…

 

As he was reaching out with his hand to call his hammer (because really what was a door, but now that he thought about it perhaps he could go through a window), Jarvis called out to him.

 

“It’s 1944, sir.”

 

“Ah, thank you, Jarvis.”

 

“Of course, I don’t think Sir would appreciate multiple holes in the tower.”

 

“Right.”

 

Thor punched in the code and stepped into Loki’s apartment with open arms, only to be slapped in the face.

 

“Owww! What in the cold Hel are you even made out of?” Loki snapped as he held his hand to his chest. Oh, how he cursed Odin for his mortality. Thor felt like a wall. His head hadn’t even moved.

 

“Why are you hitting me?” asked Thor, a bit confused. They were supposed to have sex.

 

“Why did you take so long?” Loki demanded in return.

 

“I came as quickly as I could.”

 

“Your cock needed to be in me an hour ago.”

 

“…I don’t remember making that appointment.”

 

“We didn’t.”

 

“Then why are you mad? How was I supposed to know?”

 

Loki rolled his eyes. “You just were. Now take your cock out, we’re wasting time.”

 

“How’s your hand.”

 

“Hand later. Cock now.”

 

Thor laughed and grasped Loki by his slim hips, glad that he wasn’t the only one desperate to be together again. That Loki didn’t hate him as much as he proclaimed.

 

He closed his eyes in bliss as his pants were opened and Loki’s hands made their way inside to stroke him. It had been much too long. Unwilling to wait any more, Thor ignored Loki’s undignified squawk as he threw him over his shoulder and ran to the bedroom. He placed Loki carefully on the bed, having at the right time remembered he could not throw him the way he used to. Loki was different now. Thor would have to be very careful. But not too careful, because Loki would yell at him and claim that he was not made from spun glass. But compared to Thor now… he sort of was.

 

He removed their clothes in no time at all, and finally, _finally_ pressed his lips to Loki’s. Oh how he’d missed this. Loki’s tongue forced its way into his mouth, and he alternated between strong licks and biting at Thor’s mouth. It was perfect. Thor’s hands roamed across the expanse of his little brother’s chest, pinching at his nipples and making him squeak (which Loki always denied doing – but he did, Thor was very sure they were squeaks).

 

Loki’s cock was hard and heavy in Thor’s hand, the tip oozing out pre-cum and wetting his foreskin. Feeling further down, Thor palmed his balls, and ran a dry finger along his crack. He then lined up his cock and started to push in, only to have Loki start squirming from under him, and not in a pleasant way.

 

“No, no, stop. Norns, _stop_. Are you that stupid? You can’t just shove that in me!”

 

“What are you talking about?” asked Thor, backing hips away from Loki’s struggling. “I always do.”

 

“Because I’ve always lubed and stretched myself.” Loki explained slowly. “With. My. Magic. _Magic. That. I. Do. Not. Currently. Possess_.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“ _Oh_. Do you see our dilemma?” he asked, snidely. “Now put your dick away and go get some from your room.”

 

“What? I don’t have any.”

 

“What do you mean you don’t have any?”

 

“I don’t have lube.”

 

“Why don’t you have lube?”

 

“Because I…don’t need it?”

 

Loki stared at him blankly. “What…what about to masturbate with?”

 

Thor shrugged an enormous shoulder. “I just use shampoo. Why don’t we use that?”

 

“I am not using shampoo in my ass.”

 

“Conditioner?”

 

“No.”

 

“Cooking oil?”

 

“No.”

 

“Butter?”

 

“No condiments, for fuck’s sake, Thor.”

 

“So that’s a no to jam?”

 

“Who puts jam up their ass?!”

 

“I don’t know! Desperate people?”

 

“A normal person would go to the market!”

 

“I think Dr. Banner has some creams in the medical area….”

 

“Cream in not lube, and he’s not even a real healer. You are only putting one thing up my ass Thor, and that is lube. Lubricant. Very slippery stuff, only the absolute best and lots of it as there’s no other way I am taking your massive prick without it.”

 

Thor looked between his legs. “It is quite massive,” he agreed.

 

“So…go ask Stark for some, by his reputation he should have some.”

 

“I am not asking my friends for lube.”

 

“We need it,” Loki whined.

 

“They don’t know our relationship is of an…intimate nature.”

 

“You haven’t told them we’re fucking.”

 

“Making love.”

 

“Fucking.”

 

“It’s not the right time to tell them. You tried to destroy New York, you are here as punishment, and I don’t think they can handle that I’m sleeping with you.”

 

Thor ignored Loki whispered ‘fucking’.

 

“There has to be something we can do.”

 

“There might be.”

 

* * *

 

 

“This is so fucking stupid,” groused Loki. He was bundled in a heavy jacket of Thor’s, which was far too big for him, a scarf, hat, and mittens. Why Thor had mittens and not regular fucking gloves, Loki had no idea. But in the end he didn’t fucking care, if Thor wanted to dress him like a _Frost Giant_ could actually freeze to death that was Thor’s problem. Mortality or not, he still wasn’t cold. The weather wasn’t doing anything to get rid of his half chub which was still making a valiant attempt to stay put. Regardless of his dick’s status, he was frustrated, tired and horny.

 

 _‘Stupid Thor, and his stupid not thinking._ _He could have asked Stark and made up some fucking excuse. But oh no, the Mighty Thor, the great Thunderer couldn’t let anyone think he was rubbing one out solo. Or fucking his own brother_.’

 

Honestly, Loki was going to cherish the day the Avengers found out about his extra-curricular activities with Thor. He had been getting to know the invisible house servant during his captivity, and despite throwing its master out a window once, he thought they were starting to get on famously. With this newly cultivated ‘friendship’ he would have the servant record all the reactions of the so-called Avengers on the day they found out that Loki’s ass was Thor’s favourite thing to do. Really, he could hardly wait.

 

But for that to happen and for it to be true, they had to find a boatload of good lube. A helpful young lady on the street had pointed them in the direction of Walgreens, he hoped to anyone but Odin that they found it soon –

 

No, wait, he took that back. He _did_ hope to Odin that they found the Walgreens to get a shit-ton of lube _‘for your great golden son to fuck my Jotun ass with you one-eyed fuck I hope you enjoy the fucking show. You too Heimdall!’_

Loki grinned gleefully behind his scarf, the brightness of his eyes the only give-away to his spiteful thoughts. Honestly, he really did hope they both got an eyeful of this.

 

“There it is.”

 

“Fucking _finally_.”

 

He hated mortality. His leg was cramping.

 

* * *

 

 

“Why…why are there so many?”

 

Thor and Loki stood before a large selection of lube. Different brands, types, water based, silicone based, heating and cooling, tingling, and…

 

“Flavoured. Hmmm.” Thor picked up two different flavoured lubes. Maybe they should try this? “Strawberry, chocolate…”

 

“Thor, why are there so many?”

 

“Do you want to try flavoured? I could lick it out of you too, get you wet with spit and lube… Would that make you wet enough for me?”

 

“Just pick one and get your dick in me. Is that even high quality? I need high quality. How the fuck is anyone supposed to figure this out? It’s stupid, this place is stupid, _you’re_ stupid…”

 

 _And my dick is stupid_ , Loki groused internally. As soon as they got somewhere decently warm, his dick decided that yes, yes it was even more interested in Thor’s ass in those jeans. They were utterly indecent, and he just wanted to _fuck already._

 

“Just pick something and let’s go.”

 

“Banana or peace crumble? What’s a peach crumble?”

 

“What will happen to my ass once we fuck, now hurry up.”

 

“If I get the wrong one, you’ll be upset.”

 

“I’m already upset!”

 

“Then help me pick.”

 

“No.” Loki pouted, while pretending he wasn’t pouting.

 

“Loki, please.”

 

“I said no, I’ll die a virgin then.”

 

“You’re not a virgin.”

 

“Oh, go to Hel.”

 

Thor huffed and started grabbing multiple bottles at random. Half were flavoured, some said original, he also grabbed some labeled Astroglide and KY.

 

“Is this good?” He showed Loki the basket that was almost overflowing with lube.

 

Loki glanced at it. It should be enough, maybe… He hated the not knowing of what his mortal body would need to prep him for Thor, as well as the utter bullshit for not having his magic for this. Really, it made the entire thing so much easier. He wondered, not for the first time, why Jotuns just couldn’t have self-lubricating assholes. Really, if he was going to be from a race of monsters he should at least get SOME benefit from it.

 

“Fine. Can we just go now and fuck?”

 

“You’re the one that refused the olive oil,” said Thor. “I thought that one had merit.”

 

“It’s for cooking.” Really now, Loki was getting tired of explaining this to him. “We are not cooking my ass, or making it a pastry, jelly filled or otherwise.”

 

“How about cream filled,” said Thor with a grin and a lewd wink. Loki was proud of himself for ignoring the remark with only a twitch of his brow. He also ignored the throbbing in his head, it felt like a vein might burst and he would die right there from a brain hemorrhage, but he would deal.

 

Loki continued on like he hadn’t heard Thor speak, “ _Because come morning_ , or even a minute after the sex, then _I_ would be the one to suffer all the consequences.”

 

“You could have fucked me with it.”

 

“And have your ass break my cock? No, thanks.”

 

“You don’t know that would happen.”

 

“It’s the most likely scenario.”

 

“I would not break your cock.”

 

“Yes, you would,” argued Loki.

 

“No, I – fine whatever, I would break your cock- ”

 

“Aha,” Loki grinned in triumph.

 

“Can we go now? You were so eager to leave.”

 

“Yes I am, let’s go, how do we get out of here? Where’s the merchant?”

 

Basket full of lube in one hand and grabbing Loki’s arm in the other, Thor led them both to a check out counter. Afterwards they left a very traumatized Walgreens behind. Their argument hadn’t exactly been quiet.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“Wait, wait, wait, no, stop.”

 

“What. Now. Could possibly be wrong?” Thor stared down at Loki in disbelief. They were back at the tower, naked, lubed up and ready to go. He had fingered Loki and ate him out for what felt like _hours_. Had discovered, grape flavoured lube yes, strawberry no, but he’d sort of had to eat the latter anyway. Loki was stretched, he was open, loose, and _was_ pliant in his arms. Thor’s cock had been lubed up to within an inch of its life. He didn’t think he’d ever been this wet with slick and pre-cum. Norns, he just wanted to get into Loki. And now this…

 

“What is it, Loki?”

 

“You remember your own banishment, don’t you? Remember how breakable you were? Well, that’s me now. Thanks be to your terrible father.”

 

“Can we _please_ not talk about him right now?” begged Thor, barely suppressing a shudder. Really that was the last thing he wanted to think about. “And I thought you would deny your ‘breakability’.”

 

“Yes, Thor,” snapped Loki, thoroughly unimpressed. “Because I want to be torn in two by your ridiculously large cock. I want to tear and possibly prolapse. Yes, that is my goal here, to utterly forget that I can’t take even a fraction of what I could before. Fuck you, and fuck me gently until I tell you otherwise.”

 

“You want me to be gentle?”

 

“Are you deaf as well as stupid?”

 

“I would usually just slam into you for a comment like that, but I know I can’t, so how about you just trust me?”

 

“Just don’t break my ass, I need it for other things.”

 

“I’m not going to break you.”

 

“Okay, just…do it slow.” Loki conceded.

 

Thor resisted the urge to either roll his eyes or strangle his brother, he wasn’t sure which; the entire night had been strange, and as much as he missed this, as much as he wanted Loki hard and rough sometimes. Thor almost never got to be slow and gentle with him.

 

Gripping his cock, he rubbed it against Loki’s wet entrance. Skipping over the hole, dipping and receding. It was usually the sort of thing Loki would snap at him for, but now his breathing sped up every time Thor’s cock passed him by.

 

‘ _He really is worried_.’ Thor thought. ‘ _Oh brother, don’t you know by now I would not hurt you?_ ’

 

On his next pass, Thor stopped and finally started nudging into Loki’s hole. Loki gasped as Thor’s cock head slipped passed his stubborn ring of muscle. It really was almost like their first time. Loki was so tight around him, so similar and yet different. Very gently, he started thrusting shallowly, each new thrust pushing his cock a bit further in. Loki’s pants and grunts were all that he wanted, and his eyes. Oh, his eyes. Thor didn’t think Loki knew how he was looking at Thor in this moment. But it made Thor love him all the more, and know that no matter what came between him and Loki, no matter what his brother said to him, that that love was returned in full.

 

“Oh,” breathed Loki. Thor was fully seated inside of him, his impressive length hidden away inside of Loki’s body, safe and snug where it belonged. Loki closed his eyes as his arms and legs curled completely around Thor to lock him into place. It didn’t take long for either of them. Thor’s cock brushed past his prostate, massaging it maddeningly. And the thick girth of him, oh the stretch…

 

Loki tensed and came all over their chests, tightening his arms around Thor’s neck. Thor couldn’t help a few more thrusts, Loki’s orgasm tightened his ass around Thor so intensely that the squeeze was enough to trigger his own sending floods of release inside his beloved brother.

 

Thor pulled out and rolled onto his back, taking Loki with him to rest on Thor’s chest. After a night of chaos, the afterglow made it all seem worth the trouble. He kissed Loki’s hair and trailed his hands down his back.

 

“I love you,” murmured Thor.

 

“My ass feels like a waterfall,” Loki said, wiggling his butt back and forth.

 

“Yes, please do kill the mood.”

 

“What? It’s the truth. It’s pouring out.”

 

“Loki, please.”

 

“I’m not sure of the ratio of lube to seed, since you always did come like a stud horse and _I would know_. But it’s sort of gushing.”

 

Thor watched Loki reach a hand behind himself and come away with it wet.

 

“It’s disgusting, Thor. Go start a shower for me.”

 

“You go start it.”

 

“I can’t walk, you were too rough with me.”

 

“Bullshit, that was the gentlest love I have ever made to you, you liar.”

 

Loki smirked. “Maybe I want shower sex.”

 

Thor groaned and shoved two fingers roughly into Loki’s loose hole, he grinned as Loki let out a loud squeak. And no, Loki wasn’t exaggerating. He was wet. Very wet. So very, incredibly wet.

 

Round Two was going to be a lot easier.


End file.
